today

Today is one of those days.

One of the days that I feel panicky, and my heart beats fast and my head starts to swim (although that just might be my head-cold talking).
The months are slipping by. September starts on Sunday, and graduation is a mere 8 months and a week or two away.

My first blog post was one day short of 25 months ago.
I had no idea what I wanted to do with this blog, how I wanted to write, or what kind of pictures I wanted to post. I debated whether or not to include the names of my loved ones, like some blogs who always call their husband "Charming," "Handsome" or simply "Husband".
I didn't post many specifics for a long time, until I realized that was stupid and the only people reading this are my family and friends.

That first post included this summary of my blog:

This is a diary of adventures. Having just graduated from college, my new husband and I are now taking on the grand challenge of moving to the East Coast. To Virginia. We are both life-long Arizonans, yet we are encouraged by our new state's slogan, "Virginia is for Lovers!"

I was cheesy (ok, I still am) and excited and expectant, as well as insecure and shaky and overwhelmed.

The first picture in front of our apartment - dad and Dusty unloading.
We still hadn't even stepped inside!

Empty - so much potential there. 

Mom and I working on thrifted furniture. 

My "Arizona window", which lasted maybe a few weeks before I killed them all.

One of the things that makes me laugh the most is trying to go back and embody that person I was, remembering all of my thoughts and expectations when we arrived. This place is going to be clean all the time (HA). I'm going to garden. I will have a window with thriving plants (now dead and buried). I'm going to learn to cook. I'm going to be fresh and fit and fancy. 
I remember feeling like creating that "Arizona window" embodied all of those wifely things, this tiny clean kitchen and this new blog. A new me was beginning.

Which was actually true - Dusty and I were talking the other day about how much we've changed.
I asked him what he thought was different about me, from then to now, and he said that I am confident and funny, that I make him laugh all the time. I've become a stronger person, despite not checking off all of those "good wife" checklists. And in the long run, I don't think Dusty cared all that much that I killed the Arizona window, because he didn't marry me because of my (lack of) gardening skills.
I can point to many things we've done well, and many things we've fallen short of, in our expectations of moving out here. We still have to work hard to keep things clean in our little place, we rescued two kittens, which wasn't in the (Dusty's) plan. It took me about two years to "finish" the guest room, and it's still a work in progress. That first year we ate out way too much, probably a manifestation of our homesickness that culminated into culinary laziness. We gained weight and stopped cooking as much, and I lost that sense of creativity in the kitchen. Taco Bell was the salve to my wounds, some of which I didn't even realize I had.
It was a mechanism for comfort, I suppose.

Some of the things we did right?

Luna Lovegood. Evangeline. Making each other laugh, being silly. Not taking law school too seriously. Intentionally becoming a part of the law wives. Making friends. Trying new restaurants. Traveling. Winter Wonderland. Summer 12. Embracing our cluttered, fort-like home. Loving each other. Starting my blogs. Putting each other first. Being adventurous. Falling in love with Virginia.

During the first month of my blogging, I wrote another post on the day my mom and grandma left.
I said,

Tonight will be the beginning of a long and wonderful three years of togetherness for Dusty and I, wherein we will be changed and strengthened and blessed by all that we encounter.
During one of my bouts of tears and sadness this afternoon, I simply said, "Well, this is the price of going on an adventure."

What no one told me was that there would be a second price.
Another time to pay up...saying goodbye to that adventure.
I know some of you may be thinking that this is way too early to be sad, way too early to start the process of preparing myself to move.
But honestly, I'm going to need every single day to prepare. I already get teary-eyed thinking about it. I suppose I never spent much time thinking about these three years coming to an end - because we had no idea what that would look like, and we still don't. There's a lot of unknowns and a lot of apprehension, coupled with the excitement of moving back to our beloved Arizona.
The problem is... I'm not wholly Arizonan any longer. I fell in love with this place and the people and the memories it holds. Our silly little apartment and our favorite haunts. I'm going to be leaving part of my heart here when we leave.
But...that, my friends, is the price of going on an adventure.
One I'd be happy to pay again and again.

beginning of the end

Last night, we had our very last Dean's Reception at the law school.
It was weird, guys. Really weird.
First of all, some of my favorite familiar faces weren't there. People like Allison and Greg, who have graduated and moved on.

The Dean's Reception is technically for the incoming 1L students, but since we're mentors for 1Ls, we attend and mingle and pick at the finger foods.

We got there early to avoid the crowds, because once the Dean's address is over everyone comes piling in, following the scent of punch and cheese.

I realized before we left our house last night that I didn't have any pictures from the past two Dean's Receptions. I think our first one was so darn overwhelming (plus I didn't even have an iPhone then, how archaic) and we didn't know anyone, so we didn't end up taking many pictures.
I instagrammed one picture from last year, but completely forgot to take any pictures with our friends or anything. Complete fail on my part.

Dean's Reception, 2012.

In any case, I grabbed the camera on our way out and decided to capture some of the happy moments of our very last Dean's Reception. It's the beginning of the end, everyone.

The crowds are starting to feast.

A holy mountain of cheeses is always a good idea.

Looking around the room, we started spotting a few people we knew and loved.
People who have been around from the beginning, friends and classmates of Dusty's who have made this experience all the more wonderful.

Although the Dean's Reception is probably my very least favorite event, because it's so loud and noisy and intimidating with a room full of strangers, there was still this weird sense of we belong here and this is the end....

When it was all said and done, we walked outside hand in hand and just looked at each other.
How many times can we say "time flies" before we start sounding like a broken record?
How is it even possible that this journey is heading into the last stretch already?
I feel as if we just moved in, like that tearful goodbye to my mom happened mere days ago, instead of two years ago. I feel blessed and happy and so overjoyed to have experienced this. I know we still have a year left, but I feel like it's just a handful of days that's going to sprint past us before we even have time to make any plans.
I'm sorry for anyone who feels differently, but law school has been so fun. It has been magical, adventurous, delightful, and even in the most challenging of moments it has been great and so worthwhile.

I texted Allison yesterday about the Dean's Reception, and how I had missed her being there.
She said, "Today was just no fun. I wanna be a law wife again!"
I have a feeling I'm going to feel the same way. I'm so happy we came here, and I already know I'm going to miss it like mad.

Cheers to making it - the last year! We're officially 3Ls and it feels so fine.

2012: Year in Review

It's still January, so I figure it's still appropriate to do my Year in Review of 2012!

It was one of the best years ever. 

January 

Dusty and I celebrated our one year anniversary in Arizona. We stayed in a fancy resort called The Buttes in Tempe, and had a glorious time. Back in Virginia, I played around with different recipes and made some great meatballs one time - I was stretching my wifely wings and trying to figure out meal-planning and how to cook!

February

I started contemplating the facts of life, and things I had learned since living in Virginia. It was the month of love, as well as the month of football - the superbowl! I got weird and made pancakes out of carrots, it's true. I also tried my hand at card-making, and had a super awesome Valentine's Day date with my husband. I started getting pretty homesick for Arizona, but combated it with more food. It SNOWED and we were beside ourselves with joy, and then it got even better when we had our first snow day! I started getting bored with food and decided to try to reinvent my style, playing around with fashion and discovering Ruche. I didn't stop experimenting though, and kept getting adorable things for our apartment and trying to be crafty. 

 March
We started getting excited for spring, and I tried a rosemary bread recipe that was divine. We played games and spruced up the apartment in bright yellow and green. I did my first outfit post in my first dress from Ruche! We had an amazing spring break trip to Washington D.C. with our friends Chris and Heather. It was the best time! We ate amazing food the whole time, and the weather was gorgeous. We had the BEST St. Patrick's Day Party with all of our new friends. Some key songs started getting stuck in our heads and became our life playlist for quite a while. At the end of the month my mom came for a visit over her birthday weekend - I love birthdays! Spring in Lynchburg is beautiful. We finished the month off with our first Barrister's Ball for the law school! We got all dressed up and had a fancy evening with all our friends.

April
In April I told some funny stories about my college days, but before long it was time to plan Dusty's birthday!  We had a really extravagant weekend at a bed and breakfast, celebrating my wonderful husband. Easter came along, and we had a great day full of Easter baskets and sushi. We also got to go to another NEEDTOBREATHE concert which was unbelievable. And at the end of the month, I was SO excited to be featured in Ruche's Spring DIY Guide.

May 
I started realizing it had been a while since I had posted a recipe, so I tried some weird ones and posted them. As a delightful segue into summer, we had the most perfect day at the 1st birthday party of a little boy named William, and had a sweet weekend with a cuddly kitten and movies and crafting. I was doing a lot more crafting at this point for Posies by Cait, and contemplating participating in some local craft fairs. I got in a car accident due to the horrible Virginia "merge" concept, but was feeling a lot better thanks to my husband's sweetness, a clean house, new clothes and new recipes. I came to some conclusions about why we spend money and what we spend it on. And why we're a little crazy. I shared a little flashback to our love story, when my husband and I first held hands. Our first year of law school was officially over, and we went out to a rather disastrous celebration dinner. But we ended the month out strong with lots of friends, barbecues, snow cones and yelling "summertiiiiiime!"

June
I fell in love with a new show called Best Friends Forever (BFF) that was canceled way too quickly. We went on an incredible weekend trip to Charlotte, NC with our friends Jon and Emilie. We stayed at her parent's beautiful home, ate amazing food, shopped, got called Jimmy Jons, and went to our very first Afternoon Tea. I started having pretty weird dreams, probably induced by late night caffeine and The Walking Dead. We started preparing for our trip to Arizona, because one of my best friends in the world was getting married. The week before we left was full of bliss and fireflies. I had a few more weird dreams and then, it was time to go home! We were home over father's day, which was wonderful because we both have the best dads in the world. We had the perfect week. Then my best friend got married to a really great guy with the last name Seuss! We got horribly stranded at the airport trying to come back to Virginia, thanks to dang U.S. Airways. We made it eventually, but then were struck by a DERECHO storm!

 July 
After the crazy derecho storm, the power was out for over a week! The in-laws came to visit in the middle of it all, which made for a creative twist on our time together. Regardless, we had an amazing time with them. Including the 4th of July and a trip to Washington D.C.! Then, my parents and aunt and cousin came to visit. It was the month of family visits (which we loved!) It was turning out to be the best, most active summer of our lives. So many incredible memories. I got to go to my first library conference for work! I felt official. Then finally, it was time - on July 30th, we prepared to leave for our first cruise together!

August
This month was the best. The peak of our summer mountaintop. We went to Jamaica, the Cayman Islands, and finally to Florida for Disney World and Universal Studios. We swam with dolphins, encountered a city of sting rays, soaked up the sun, swam in crystal blue water, and enjoyed every day. Our first day at Disney we spent with our friends, Jon and Emilie! It was a blast. The next day was just us. We had some crazy stories and amazing experiences. We finished out a trip by going to Harry Potter World - it was magical. When we got back, I was excited to find out I was featured on Ruche's blog! Then the next few weeks before school started back up again were a blur. This summer will forever be known as Summer Tweeeeeelve!

 September
I spent a lot of time reminiscing of days gone by. I did a few Flashback Friday posts; the first was about our first apartment together. I found out all the ways to ruin your life by 30. I had some thoughts on habits and junk food (Arby's is dead to me). I flash back again, to a little kitten named Ambrosius. I decided on my top 5 favorite movies. I ran The Color Run with a bunch of girl friends! One last flashback focused on some weird things from my childhood. At the end of the month, we went apple picking with some law school friends and I made my first apple pie. And best of all, we got a new kitten! And I decided to challenge myself to 31 days of wearing dresses: Frocktober.

October

The best of all the months! I started my Frocktober challenge, and realized that I am extremely awkward. The 5th came around, which is my birthday time! I love birthdays, and got so many fun surprises. The biggest of all being the BEST SURPRISE PARTY EVER. Frocktober ended up being a lot of fun. I somehow made it through! Week 1, Week 2, Week 3, Week 4, Week 5. I joined my first book club. I made some BOMB Pumpkin Mac & Cheese. I contemplated purse purchases. We went to the State Fair in North Carolina! (And almost died). We carved pumpkins with friends, and I made chili for a chili cook-off! Then we all went and rooted for our law school husbands to play flag football for the annual Turkey Bowl, and ate all the delicious chili entries. For Halloween, we went to our church's Harvest Festival and dressed as Carl and Ellie from UP. :)

November
It was officially holiday season. It was time to start getting Pumpkin Spice Lattes every day. As the month progressed, I thought about my favorite TV fashion icons. I went to a new coffee shop in a new city with new music, and great people. I decorated hard core for Christmas: Winter Wonderland. I did an outfit post attempting the tights-with-shorts trend. I made delicious Caramel-Filled Apple Cider Cookies for a cookie swap! I did my first blog giveaway for Posies by Cait accessories. I reminisced on how blessed we are to have such fun, energetic and amazing friends here in Virginia, who have awesome theme parties with us. And best of all, we surprised our families by going home to Arizona for Thanksgiving! We were able to meet our new niece, Annabella, and our new nephew, Wyatt, for the first time. It was the best.

December
Cold weather, and lots of Christmas music! We had our annual Law Wives Christmas Tea, which is my favorite event. We somehow survived through finals week, and celebrated Dusty's hard work with a date night and our own little Christmas! We finally found OUR sushi place, which we now eat whenever we get the chance. We spent the most amazing two weeks in Arizona for Christmas and New Year's, soaking up time with family and friends and the gorgeous desert. We got to see our friends from California, Britany and Bryce, who came and visited us while we were home! We went shopping, ate Mexican food, went to parties, enjoyed the amazing weather, laughed a lot, went to Zoo Lights, spent time with loved ones, exchanged gifts and made memories. We had the perfect New Year's Eve. I made some realistic resolutions for 2013, that I can't wait to keep.

I now realize what a blessing this blog has been for me - it has been an evolution of me. It has grown with me, changed with me, been weird with me. It has been the testament to my growth as a person, and to the growth of my hobbies and interests. It has been the love bank of funny stories and sweet moments between Dusty and I. It has been my diary, my friend, a therapeutic device. 

All I can say is, I can't wait to see what 2013 will bring. 2012 was a beautiful year. A year of adventures and unbeatable memories! It was the year of "summer tweeeeeelve!" and so many other silly and awesome moments that will live on forever in our hearts. 

I raise my glass to 2012 - and hang it in my life's hall of fame.

Now, let's give a toast to the New Year and all its mysterious joys. 

In love,

Cait